Just One Look Forum Archives

I just wanted to share a bit about the effects of looking on my life. I was a devotee of Osho for thirty years and all of this experience was incredibly rich and life-affirming.

The looking for me seemed to be pretty obvious from the beginning, this sense of me just a little obscured by 'spritual ideas' of what I should look like. Anyway I always had a spiritual dialogue going on in my head Osho's words pointers to the truth, etc. going on and on... I must say although I do listen to John a lot he has really succeeded in not turning this into a teaching, I don't hear his voice in my head HA! or if I do it's "just look'. I am the only one who can do it.

The self-reliance thing just never seemed possible for me until recently. I feel as the looking has really taken over my life, as the fear of getting it wrong lessens I am feeling less and less at stake in anything I express or don't express. It's all just fine and such a relief to feel I tell the truth more.

Also about money, since I began pledging to this work I am amazed at the abundance in my life. I live on a small pension and recently my brother offered me an all expense paid trip to Florida. My daughter loves to spend time with me since I'm not trying to control her life and she's always offering me gifts and outings. I really feel this trust that all I need will be provided. Isn't money an energy and we need it to keep this alive and kicking?

Maureen

I love that feeling or sense of abundance when it comes my way. Gratitude is always right on its heels. Sometimes overwhelm is around the corner, but less so these days. My brother equates money with energy and says that what goes out comes in. You can read that to mean that the more that goes out, the more that comes in. I don't know about that, but I do know my relationship with money has softened. Money triggers, true, but the amperage is mild so that the disturbance is nothing compared to what it used to be. Years ago I turned the handling of our finances over to my wife, and that kept me at a greater distance. That would no longer be as helpful today as it was then, thanks in large part to the looking. And it's not that I'm more financially secure now than then, and it's not that I've gotten clearer about it or more balanced or understanding or anything whatsoever to do with what I think or the ideas and concepts I've developed. The looking has worked across the board in diminishing the drive to do something about any situation or set of circumstances for the sake of survival or need to satisfy any of my neurotic themes. Instead, I do because I do, and that's kind of the end to it. I'm still interested in why I do it, but mostly as a matter of curiousity or habit.

Maureen, I salute you for your years of work with Osho. I salute all of us for the journeys through life we have undertaken. Trimpi

What wonderful comments here. I think it is very useful to consider how the context of fear has dictated our relationship with money. I have been impressed in my conversations with John and Carla how although they have lived very close to "bust", and continue to be not far from it, they have never appeared "afraid" in the face of this. Concerned, yes, but not fearful. For me two places that I find that the transition given by the looking shows up is in the areas of sex and money; two areas of human experience that I think we are particularly crazy. These day I find that my relationship with money is "respectful", but not fearful, i.e. I am clear that it is an important aspect of functioning in the world, and a necessary element of the creative process, and I am also clear that it exist in "abundance" vs. the perception of it given by fear; that it is "scarce". There are still neurotic moments in this area of life for me as there are with sex, but they are moments, they used to be not only always there, but appeared to be "true". It is so useful to notice the difference and notice that it is the absence of the fear of life, an aspect of which is the fear of not having enough, that has diminished. Fulfillment is present when the fear diminishes.

Thank you for being here.

David